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we all go through things sometimes that make us question things, or hurt enough that we cope with them in any way we can, even if it's not intentionally, but it's just us, and how we handle it. i know exactly how it feels, i've been there before. at first you try not to feel it, until it almost feels like you don't at all anymore, as if believing it becomes reality. you have to learn how to let yourself break down sometimes if you feel like it, but at the same time, find some way to let yourself feel again. don't hide your feelings from yourself. write it all out, everything you're feeling. if you're afraid of judgment, write it for yourself, every little thing you feel no matter how immature it sounds, or whether or not you'd really say it to the person it's intended for. sometimes it helps to write it as if for someone else to read, even if you don't actually share it with someone. try and find ways to feel again, even if it's something small at first. what makes you happy, gives you that little adrenaline rush? what makes you feel something besides all the numbness and pain? don't feel like you're alone in your feelings
you can always talk to me if you need someone to talk to
feel free to private message me if you have any other questions or just need someone to talk to or listen 
