Relationship Issues & Advice

[Millieee_xoxo]

I am in year 9 and have been with my bf for two months and I want to know if its too pushy to want something more serious? not sex just commitment.. as sappy as that sounds. thanks

[_curious · Accepted solution]

You both are still young. In my own opinion, year 9 is to young to be settling down with someone and pushing for commitment. However, sometimes it works out, depending on the couple. My best advice is to try and focus on getting yourself educated before you think about getting serious with a boy. At the end of the day, it is your choice. Hope this helps

[Nyctimene]

Not before at least 18 to me and honestly more like 20. It kind of irks me when I see teens wanting really serious, committed relationship and even marriage. If you're that serious about someone then what is the rush? If they're not going anywhere afterall. It seems like people who know their relationship *isn't* actually serious/that they may NOT hold onto someone are often the ones desperate to rush into a 'serious' relationship and commitment as a desperate bid to hold on to their relationship and then they end up being divorced by 18 or 19.

[stayclassy]

By saying you're in "year 9" I assume you're in grade 9 in school.

I think you should just take it one day at a time. I had a 2 year relationship (my first one) when I was in grade 10 and even though it doesn't feel anything close as amazing as my current serious relationship does (I'm 24), I still learned a lot. He was a good boyfriend that treated me well and after the relationship was over I was single for 5 years because I had high standards. I knew what I was looking for-- someone better than my ex who treated me well and I had a good sexual connection with. I also knew I didn't want to marry that boyfriend. We did talk about it because as kids we thought we already had the best but sometimes I thought I didn't want to marry the first boyfriend I was with because I needed to explore more.

So I dated during those 5 years I was single. I think it's better when you have a steady and good relationship during high school instead of dating different immature high school guys.