Is it normal that I didn't enjoy sex with him at all?

Last night I went out with my male bestfriend. Since our high school friend was back in town for this weekend, we went to her house to drink with other high school friends. We had a pleasant time there and got a bit drunk, me more than him since he had to drive me back home.

When we left our friend's house at around 4:30 a.m., we drove around town and tried to climb inside our old high school. We failed so we ended up going to his grandparents' house. Since it was very late, we climbed over the fence to the terrace and the pool area. We talked and smoked for a while before I told him it was late and I needed to go home. He nodded and led me inside a bedroom and started kissing me. I, having had history with him, kissed him back and he ended up giving me oral.

Now, my two issues are:
1.) I didn't like the sex. It isn't like I disliked the sensation, it just failed to turn me on so I ended up pretending I got off. I mentioned this to my best friend (who is much more experienced than me considering I'm a virgin) and she said maybe he wasn't good at it and that's why I didn't enjoy it. He was also fingering which was a bit painful and weird to me considering I've masturbated before. Was he just too rough and bad at it? Or is it normal to not be turned on by it?
Take into consideration that this is a guy I've wanted to kiss for such a long time and to find that I didn't enjoy fooling around with him at all fucks me up.

2.) I consider myself a bisexual person. I've dated a girl before and it was great, I did get turned on with her although we never got to have sex. Since dating her, it's been harder for me to imagine myself with a guy. I mean, I do see guys as being sexy and I can imagine myself doing stuff with them but why is it that she has turned me on far more than any other guy I've fooled around with? Am I just lying to myself and not admitting I'm a lesbian??

Please help, I'm really confused.

Wecome to
It's hard to say with just one night. Considering all the circumstances. Drinking was involved. It was very late, 4:30am, you're tired, intoxicated, smoking was involved (it doesn't specify if they were cigarettes, or marijuana, or vape, or something else).

Combining all that: {alcohol, lack of sleep, smoking}, your body and mind probably just not fully in the mood for sex at that point, so even if the hotest Chippendales dancer man had showed up the result still might have been only mediocre.

Try kissing him when you're sober and see how it goes.

Bisexual is fine. (Even many normal women have had bisexual experiences.) Spend a minute every now and then to sit quietly with yourself and just observe your feelings. Let the feelings come to you. Note and observe your feelings. Just observe them without judgement. This quiet minute can help tune your brain and bring clarity and peace to your mind.

You wanted to kiss this guy for a long time, so you're not totally a lesbian yet.

Keep a watch on how much you drink, and smoke. Remember addiction is when you decide to stop, and discover you can not stop. As long as you can stop, and have no problem stopping, then you are OK.

And alcohol can diminish your ability to enjoy sex or perform.

I wouldn't read too much into it, you need to be in the right mood for your body to respond a certain way, and I think being drunk and maybe wired up from being up all night dorking around with friends might have put you in the wrong mood. Like del said if you listen to you body and thoughts over time you will know who you are or aren't attracted to.

I would guess three quarters of girls are attracted to another girl at least at some point in their lives it is normal! Good luck!


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