Sex with married ex!

hey! So, I have been friends with this guy since we were in middle school. We dated in high school and when we broke it off we stayed friends. It was a very intense relationship. We didn't have sex... I was a virgin at the time.. He wasn't. It was just very emotional and we were very close. He considers me one of his best friends... In college I dated someone for a year and lost my virginity and my friend met someone and they got engaged and married. Since then we still hangout as friends. A few years ago we hooked up at his apartment while his wife wasn't around. We did not have sex but basically everything else. He told me he had always been in love with me and should have married me instead... I stopped talking to him for a year because I felt we crossed a line.. But recently I texted him out of the blue and now we've been talking over text a lot. He asked me to have sex... So this weekend we hung out and wound up getting a hotel room. We had been drinking and when we got the room we were just talking for a few hours. Then he told me he always thinks about me, always wAnted to have sex with me and was in love with me. We fooled around but never had sex even in the hotel room. It got late and he had to get home to his wife. I know it's wrong but I really do want to sleep with him... But I don't know how he feels after this incident.. Also I feel horrible because he's married and I wouldn't want me husband or bf doing this to me ugh it's just so complicated please give some advice!?

hey, i honestly don't know what to say...i guess if you are feeling hottible about the whole situation you should just stop and leave everything no contact or anything. Since you just fooled around, i wouldn't say anything to the wife, however just stop everything and ditch the guy...if he wasn't happy in his relationship with his wife he doesn't need to hide anything to make you feel like this.

But it's honestly your choice...?

i believe in karama, probably this might happen to you with your significant other and that wouldn't feel great to find out....?

I'm always here to talk if you need it
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Hey Kelly! First let me just say, you are not the only one that is possibly having this "situation" happen in their lives. Honestly, as human beings, as women period, it's so hard to control our feelings and emotions which makes it even harder to control our hormones. When we have a?strong desire for someone, or have had a strong love and bond with someone, it is so hard to let that go and just see them be happy with someone else... especially if the person is not showing that they are serious about who they are with. We?become more emotionally attached which is what makes it harder for us to let go?of someone.?Does this justify making the decisions you've made that you?stated in your previous post? Of course not! As women, it is so important to have some level of respect for ourselves. A level of morality. You not only disrespected a sacred bond between a husband and wife (him as well) but you disrespected yourself as a woman. I am absolutely not intentionally trying to?judge you in no way shape or form. Knowingly messing around with a married man, or any man in a relationship for that matter, says a lot about who you are as a person. Even if he seems to not be respectful of his own marriage, it is still your place to respect it. No you didn't take those vows and did not commit to being loyal to his wife, that's his job, yes? But you have to, at some point, make a vow and commitment with yourself, stating that you are worth more than a man who is married to another women. And I totally agree with the individual above... we reap what we sew. We all are going to run into situations where we experience, hurt, heartache, pain, some rooting from the decisions we've made in the past. You don't want to put yourself in a position where you curse your own marriage or future relationships... or not even just yours, but your kids future marriages and relationships. I advise that you pray, seek forgiveness from God, and cut ties from your "friend". You both crossed lines that I am sure his wife will be beyond pissed and hurt about. As women we're supposed to stick together and empower eachother. Women that do what you did usually are the reason why other women become insecure in their relationship... and take it from me, that feeling of insecurity is not a great feeling and is not easy to bounce back from. Please remember that for your future relations. If he don't respect his WIFE, the person he made his vows to in front of God and idk who else, then he will not respect you in the long run.... And he's hitting you up for sex? You're just someone he knows might be available when there's trouble at home with his wife.....?Personally, I suggest you let that part or?chapter of your life go.... it might not be easy.... but as long as you begin the process of letting go... that's a start.

​I hope this helps love! And please remember, Love yourself more!!! Self-love and self respect is THE MAJOR KEY ;)

hey girls! Thanks for the advice. I was getting too emotionally involved with him. We talked over the phone about him being married and he cares about me etc. I was afraid to let him go because I've been single for a few years now. I know, pathetic. Anyway he wanted to see me in a hotel tomorrow and tell his wife he was with a friend. I was gonna pay (200) bucks I'm not broke but I'm just sayin yeah lol! He wanted to only stay until about 10 to go home to his wife. I couldn't go down that road. So today he asked if I was still down for it... And I said... I lied to him I said I met someone and wanted to see where it would go. So he got mad and I said yeah but you can't be mad you're married. :-( ️thx for advice. Idk if he just wanted sex or if he loved me but I just can't.

He just liked how convenient you were. Know your worth. You'll be just fine without him . Soon, you'll meet someone who is truly all about you... no gimmicks... best wishes love!!!

 

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