Long Story, But I Need Help

Okay, so this is a long story, but i have to tell it all for it to be understandable. So this guy and i start working together around 3 years ago. We start off as friends. I had a boyfriend of 3 years at the time and i'm a faithful person, so i never considered anyone else. Well slowly we become flirty. In the meantime, i break up with my boyfriend (nothing to do with the new guy, we're just better friends than a couple). After we break up, we start to be more flirty and we're always fixated on each other, and he admits feelings for me, i admit feelings for him. Great. Well about a month later he says he doesn't want a relationship right now and he just wants to be single. Okay cool, no hard feelings i'm cool with being friends (we remained super flirty though but we never even kissed). Jump to a month later and he starts dating this girl we work with. Everyone was mean to her because they wanted him to date me and i wasn't cool with that so i was nice to her and became friends with her. I'll keep this part short. They dated off and on for a year until last january because turns out she's psycho and cheated on him several times, etc. So he starts hanging out with everyone again (we have mutual friends) and we're flirty again. Then out of nowhere he starts dating another girl around march. They only date for a few weeks, then break up. After that, he starts hanging out at my house a lot because he became best friends with my male roommate (also a mutual friend). So he was around all the time and we continued our flirty relationship...well he admitted feelings to me again and i did too and everything was great. We were pretty much in the talking phase. We still hadn't slept together because he apparently told my roommate that i wasn't just some girl that he wanted to sleep with and that was it and that he likes me a lot and has respect for me. Plus i move slower in a relationship. Well, out of nowhere he says he just doesn't want a relationship with anyone and he wants to focus on himself and trying to get himself out of debt...aka focus on work and bettering himself. And he pretty much says he doesn't want to hurt me, like the first time and he just wants to be upfront and if i want to still hang out then great, but he wanted to be honest with me. Well i told him that i was at a point in my life where i was happy and i was just going with the flow so i was fine with how things were. Everything went back to normal. After a while i started staying at his house, and we started sleeping together.

Here's where i'm at now.?I've been staying at his house for around 8-9 months, and maybe stayed at my place a handful of times. Even when he works (3rd shift) i still stay over at his house....and it's not me being annoying and overstaying my welcome, he always asks me to stay and he wants me to stay. We act like a couple, everyone thinks we're a couple. He's openly affectionate toward me, even around his friends. Little things. You can tell he really cares about me and it's way past a friends with benefits thing. Anyways, he's moving back home in a month and a half, which is about 45 min-1 hour away so not too bad. But he still claims that he doesn't want to be in a relationship, meanwhile i'm pretty sure i'm in love with him. I've even met his parent's and they said he talks about me a lot to them. My best friend says i should sit him down and talk to him about it, but part of me wants to wait and see if it fizzles out on it's own when he moves (which would be easier for me than breaking it off now because i won't see him as much) or see if we do continue to see each other, THEN i'll talk to him about it, because we're basically dating without the label. Another part of me wants to tell him how strongly i feel about him, just because it's exploding inside of me.

Honestly, i don't know what to do. Because some say i'm wasting my time, but i personally don't feel that way. I'm happy when i'm with him, despite everything else. What would you do?

I personally wouldn't have invested so much time and emotion into a person who won't commit, especially since he told you he didn't want a relationship then turned around and got a girlfriend. He was (and still is) just trying to keep his options open.
I think if you don't talk to him about it he's going to end up with a new girl after moving away, so if you want it to continue and be a real thing then you should tell him if not just leave it alone.

 

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