Please hear me out, I would love your advice! So I met this guy online, I'm 22 and he's 23, and we had a really nice first date that led to a second date. He gave me my first kiss that night and I was over the moon! I have been on dates but I've never had a boyfriend because I'm more reserved and to be honest I'm quite picky. But I was glad to finally find a guy that liked me like I liked him. For our second date we went to get ice cream, which was nice, and after we just walked around the city and talked about random stuff. Afterwards he asked me to go to his place. I was kind of nervous because I hardly knew the guy, but I decided to take a risk because I basically always play things safe. So when we got to his place he showed me around, he always showed me his piano and played a few songs. And then after we talked he leaned over and we started making out. I was still in my nervous state so I just wanted to make sure we were on the same page and I said, "You were my first kiss on the other date, so sorry if I'm a bit weird with this." He didn't really say much about it, he just said "Okay." I felt a little put off by that, but?we continued hooking up anyway. We didn't have sex because I wasn't ready for that yet. After we just kind of laid there and cuddled when he conveniently told me "I just wanna let you know I'm not looking for a relationship, I know the timing is bad and I should have mentioned earlier." I didn't know how to react, part of me felt used and really angry and on the other side I felt like I could be okay with it, just because my love life is so dull. But I kept my emotions pretty subdued and I got pretty quiet. He seemed concerned and when I called him the next day to talk about it he was pretty understanding and said "If you don't want to do this it's fine, we can still hangout without hooking up." Which made me feel a little less used, but when I talked about my situation with all of my friends they didn't seem to like his perrogative, and they thought I deserved better. But I convinced myself I was having fun, and that I was okay with this new "relationship" in my life. I just felt like I was putting forth more effort, he's in school in the city so he gets around by foot, so I'm always driving up about 20-30 minutes to see him. Also he takes 6 hours every time to reply to my messages, which I understand if you're busy, I just hate that it makes me a little annoyed sometimes. Another thing is that he won't text unless I say something first. I initiated hanging out for pizza a few weekends ago on a Friday night, and he told me less than an hour before out date "I only have a couple of hours, is that ok?" And I don't know why but I just got so upset because everything my friends thought about him was true, he didn't really care for me all that much. I just put in so much time for this guy and I hardly get that in return! So I texted back and said "Just forget it" and he never replied, I really regret it now. So much that I couldn't stop thinking about him and three weeks later (yesterday), I texted him and said "So sorry if I overreacted, If you still want to hang out with me I'd really like that, if not I understand." But still no repsonse. I know I should move on but can you blame me? He was my first kiss and I just regret what I said and I feel like I could still be hanging out with him if I had just never sent that text! Do you guys think my response and apology was valid or did I overreact? Thanks, and sorry it's so long!!!
You didn't girl he just looking for a hookup or a friends with benefits, you don't deserve that girl because you want a relationship not a person to hook up with. Not all first kiss is magically and you just want to forget about it.?
I don't think you overreacted, I think he wasn't into hanging out with you for whatever reason. By saying "just forget it," you didn't lose much imo, there was nothing there. Of couse I am only basing this on what you wrote and I might be wrong but, I would suggest moving on. Good luck!
You didn't overreact. His goal was ultimately?to have sex with you (though that really could have changed if you decided to JUST be his friend). Don't regret texting him to forget it. It's just hard to get over him because you really thought it might become more. Maybe you were hoping he would say something back and "fight" for the "relationship," and you were let down because he didn't. You did the right thing. He's no good. You can do MUCH better.
At least he made his intentions clear with you. You shouldnt expect much from a guy who says up front that he's not looking for a relationship