Make a move first?

So I've had a crush on one of my friends for the past few months, and it hasn't been clear to whether or not he like me too. A few weeks ago he drunkingly told one of my friends that he likes me, and was going on asking if he had a chance with me. After hearing about that, I expected things to be pretty different, but texting and hanging out has been pretty much the same, except for twice when we cuddled and held hands. No talk about what it means afterwards though. Last week, after a music concert we had both been to but got seperated in the crowd, one of my friends told me she heard he had hooked up with someone in the crowd. Since then, I've been feeling kind of stupid since I got my hopes up and everything, but really I don't know if it's true or not. All my friends wanna see us together and are telling me to make a move, but if he actually did hook up with someone I don't want to. What should I do?

Hi Snoopydays,

I now exactly how you feel because I have been in your situation before. What I would suggest is "Show but don't tell". Show him that you are interested in him but don't tell him because you want to see if he will reciprocate the same feelings towards you. Don't go all out and show him you 100% have feelings for him, because you wouldn't want to get hurt. Just talk to him more and hang out with him a bit more and see if he initiates any of the hanging out. If he is interested in you then he would want to be around you.

If you want to know if he hooked up with that girl, you will only know if you ask him. Maybe just ask him in a friendly way, don't make him feel like you are interrogating him. Just be like "Hey, that concert was really fun the other night, where did you go when we got separated in the crowd?"
See what he says and then decide if you want to make a move or not.

I hope this helps :)

May I ask why his hooking up with someone will make you reconsider?

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I get that it's not a big deal, and there's no commitment with me so he has every right to do so, I just don't feel like he'd really?be into me if he was hooking up with another girl at a concert when he could spend time?with me at the same concert.?
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didnt you said you guys were sepeated by the crowd and going through a crowd is really tough, plus it could be a rumor that he hooked with soemone or someone confuse someone else to be him, so why dont you just ask him but dont be straight up asking him

​why dont you try to flirt with him and see if he flirting back
or
​confess to him, nothing wrong telling a guy how you feel

Well you have mutual friends it sounds like so I will give the same advice I give a lot on this board lol.

If you have a mutual friend who you trust to be more on your side than on his side, have her tell him that you were asking about him or that you said something nice about him (nothing major just like, you liked his shirt or you think he's funny or something like that). He SHOULD get the hint.

If you have mutual friends but you don't trust them to be on your side completely, just mention him in front of them a couple of times, like you wonder what he's up to or it was fun hanging out with him, they SHOULD mention it to him (might take a couple of times for them to make note and remember to say anything and this is assuming they don't have some other agenda like hooking him up with somebody else).

Also when you see him smile and look happy to see him, I mean this sounds super obvious but it's worth saying!! And stand or sit close to him when you can without it seeming weird.

Personally I would not go up to a guy and say "I like you do you like me" or anything along those lines because number 1, I am a big chicken, number 2 I don't think it works from observing other people, I think guys make fun of girls who do that.

JMO!! Good luck!!

HELLO! WELL I'D PERSONALLY TALK TO HIM IN PRIVATE. WHAT YOU GUYS NEED IS A MATURE CONVO TO MAKE THINGS CLEAR BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU AND SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT ON WHETHER YOU BOTH WANT TO START DATING OR NOT. ONCE YOU HAVE THAT CONVO, EVERYTHING WILL BE MUCH BETTER BETWEEN YOU GUYS WITHOUT POSSIBLE AWKWARD MOMENTS OF NOT KNOWING WHETHER TO TELL HIM YOU LIKE HIM OR WISH THE GROUND WOULD ABSORB YOU IN. BEST OF LUCK :)

 

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