A Midlife Crisis?

Okay, well let's start this.

Last summer I met a man at a wedding. Nothing happened between us, other than spending the first night we ever met talking to 5am. We were both in the wedding party (he was best friend of the groom, and I was brides best friend). It was amazing. He was this great guy- but he was 11 years older than me. He is 40 years old. His friends said they had never seen him hang around so much nor often, and they believed it was because of me. Then iI went back to my home, which was 20 hours away.

We spoke on social media but nothing came of it, until about January. We spoke every day. At first the age difference bothered me, but I came around to it, because he was amazing. Then in March I stayed with him for a week, because I had a job interview in his town, and wanted to move there to be with him. He encouraged this. The week we spent together was perfect. He was so affectionate, and kind, and just always would have some part of him touching me at all times, whether is was a hand or foot or what not.

He was now my boyfriend, and I felt very optimistic about our future. He told me he could see us growing old together, and wanted to be together. I moved to his small town to be with him in May because i got the job (go me!).

Something happened between March and May. It was only a month and a half, but within that time- Something changed. Within two weeks of me moving to his town, he ended it. Told me he had to get his shit together before we could be together. It was over. During this month a half, he even went out and bought a corvette.

I asked him what about in the future with us, and he said we need to take it slow and that he does like me, but right now is not the time for him to be in a relationship. But he wants to hang out with me and such.

I am so confused on what to do or how to feel. Things ended half way through May, and now it is August, and he is being both an asshole, and a decent guy.? All he does is drink now, and show off his car to anyone who will listen. He has a bunch of new friends who our mutual friends have no idea who they are. He is being distant to everyone... He drinks and drives. It's so stupid but he won't listen to anyone.

The weekend after he ended it with me- my friend and I were at the bar, he walks in (drunk off his ass), with his friend, and two girls- one who looked exactly like me. He has a few more drinks, then leaves with the girl who looks like me. They get into his corvette and he drives off drunk into the night. I was heartbroken to see this.

So I am confused as to how to go about this whole situation. I feel he is going through some mid life crisis, and he won't talk about it. We still hang out- once or twice a week, to watch movies or just chill. Sex still does happen sometimes... which I should not let happen, but when it comes to him- he has me hook, line, and sinker.

What should I do? His mother tells me he is depressed, and all he does is drink and play golf (he owns a store and doesn't need to work, as he has income coming in just from owning it... his mother says he has too much money and doesn't know what to do). His mother wants us together. But I tell her that her son is going through some type of mid life crisis, and she laughs and tells me she has never seen him as happy as he was as when we were together. (Jan through April)... but something changed.? I honestly don't know what to do.

I am sure i left stuff out, and may have been a bit confusing.. but it's driving me insane. I want to be with him, but he calls himself "undateable".

The truest indicators are the signs that actually illustrate drastic lifestyle changes in a person's life.It's having someone point out you are in a midlife crisis can be enough stress to trip a person into actually starting a midlife crisis.I developed this list of signs over a decade ago based on my professional and direct work with hundreds of people within midlife crisis. Even if you have most of the signs listed here, don't panic. The most important truth is that this event doesn't have to become a crisis.?

 

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