My friend needs help and soon!

My best friend since the fourth grade is going in a downward spiral and quick. This last June everyone in our senior class graduated but her. Now she has been drinking all day long and smoking pot whenever she can. In the last week she has started some dangerous things. She started smoking four packs of cigs a week, doing acid and also cocaine on top of being sloppy drunk 24/7. I dont know what to do. Help please.

She's your best friend? And you don't do those things?

One option, find an "OPEN" AA or NA meeting and take her. "Open" means you don't have to "be" an alcoholic or drug addict (or more appropriately, "a person who has a problem with drugs or alcohol". Don't let your problems define who you are.) This won't instantly cure her. She'll at least see what they are about.

People like her often are running away from something, trying to cover up hurt with drugs. See her as a person with a problem, but still a person. Separate the problem from the person. Find the hurt beneath the problem.

And find a Nar-Anon or Al-Anon or Families Anonymous group for yourself. You're going to need it. You'll experience the healing power of processing groups. Then you'll understand better how AA and NA work to heal those who suffer.

Bottom line is you can't make anyone recover. You can only love them, lay out options for them, love them, encourage them, see them as people who are unhappy and hurting, trying to cover up the hurt with drugs.

Sometimes getting arrested may save their life.

Always take care of yourself. Set boundaries. I tell my addicted friend, "You can come visit, but you can't stay, because honestly you're an incorrigible asshole when you're on drugs, but I still care about you deeply. Wash my dishes I'll give you $5." (That way they at least work for the money. Don't expect a good job. Also don't let them in your house they tend to steal everything.)

Oh, one other option I forgot, our town has a "methadone clinic" where people addicted to certain things can get counceling, doctor, and methadone which can help them stop using drugs. It's substituting one drug for another. They end up addicted to methadone, but it's better than the alternative. Then they have to slowly ween off the medication. (There's also Suboxone. Same idea, with the same problem. Just more expensive.) Doesn't work for everyone. Some just cold turkey quit and suffer the withdrawals. (Often in jail. Very unpleasant but gets it over with, cheap and fast.)

But the big problem still is moving them away from the drugs to a new environment. Sometimes to a new town. And addressing the hurts and emotional problems which led to drugs in the first place.

I only have one question. Where are her parents? :O?

It is better to talk to her parents and take her to some addiction center as soon as possible. Do something before it is too late. My cousin was also addicted to alcohol and he was taken to an addiction center in Toronto. After few counseling sessions and treatments, he is perfectly fine now.

How is your friend now?Is she fine?


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