I've always had trouble making friends. It's always something about people I meet that I'm not compatible with. One friend I had was all into looks, boys, and had a high school mentality that was far from me. Plus she was spoiled and was doing things with guys I won't mention and dragging me into it, so I cut her off. Another one I had was rude. Rude as in she would touch my hair all the time without permission, even when I told her to stop. I'm Black and I get the reaction of Whites wanting to touch my poofy hair a lot. It's okay, I guess, but I can't stand it when the boundary is crossed and you're patting my hair like it's a cloud. She would just cross the line a lot about many things and did not respect me, so I ditched her as well. I also had a similar friend like that who I also ditched. And then there was just people who I considered buddies, but then later as just people from my neighborhood or school.I felt like they were all fake and thought I was weird since I like to read books. I've always been looked at for that and it's only now I'm feeling embarrassed about it. But anyway, the only genuine friend I had doesn't talk to me anymore. We lost contact after I began doing online school in eighth grade. I've made attempts at reaching out to her but it's not working. It's like she gave up and cut me off. So now I'm pretty much friendless.
I just wanna know why it's so hard.
I have the same problem as you... I wonder why out of all the people in the world I cannot find a true friend I can bond with and feel comfortable with :) sure, i have those "friends" that you occasionally text and hang out with... but it always feels like I'm reaching out first. Like if I don't text them first, they won't text me for several weeks... you are not alone, and you are definitely not weird. To be honest, I love reading a good book!! Finding that true friend may be an extremely hard task, but she or he is out there somewhere. And as life moves on, you may realize that you do not necessarily need friends to be happy.?