I was raped, is it my fault?

I am 14 at the time I was 13 and the guy was 21. We were making out and I had let him finger me and then he tried to go farther but I didn't want to. He started pulling at my pants and I kept telling him "NO NO!" I told him no 7 or 8 times and he wouldn't stop. I didn't want to do it! He wouldn't leave me alone though so I gave in. The cops said since I said no and didn't want to have sex with him that it was still rape. I feel that it's my fault though for giving in I should have fought back, but I was scared if I did he'd really hurt me. Is it my fault I was raped?

i've been in your situation before, and it is never your fault, especially when you continued to say no repeatedly. you stopped resisting out of fear of physical or other harm. that is rape, no matter what anyone else says. rape is never your fault, and it takes a lot to be able to tell someone what happened...don't be afraid of standing up for yourself now. you deserve to be able to have closure on that horrible experience. but no, it is NEVER your fault!!
pm me if you ever need to talk

No! What happened was not your fault. I know it may sound cliche but NO means NO. End of! Please stop blaming yourself!

It is not your fault that you got raped. It is the rapist's fault that you got raped. Additionally, since the guy was 21, he raped a minor.

Most adult men feel really weird about the idea of even dating a minor. So the fact that this man raped you, a minor, means he is sick in the head.

You might feel guilt if he gets charged, (which you wouldn't have good reason to, because it WAS his fault) but think about this. What if you're not the only one who was raped? What if he's raped others? By even telling the cops about it, you did a good deed for yourself and possibly others.

 

NO NO NO!!! It is never the persons fault!!!!! You did what you could and if you were AFRAID thats even worse!!!!! It will never be you're fault!!

Listen to me. IT IS NEVER YOUR FAULT. You did NOTHING to deserve rape! NO ONE DESERVES THAT. The media fills our heads with this bullshit that it is something we did. Like our dress causes a man to just not control himself and so he has no choice but to rape us. It is all lies and a load of bullshit and an attack on us as women. You did nothing wrong! I am so sorry this has happened to you, but please, do not blame yourself. It is the fault of that scum who took advantage of you. Only his fault.

It is NOT even close to being your fault. It is only the other person's fault. They should respect you saying no over and over and just let it be and move on. Don't ever think that being raped is your fault. It is his. Just because you gave in because you didn't want to get hurt even more isn't a bad thing, just means that you were that scared. It isn't a bad thing. Yes it is better to fight back but when you are in that situation everything runs through your mind and you get scared, it's ok. Just stay strong and keep telling yourself that it is not your fault. Don't dwell on the situation because it'll just make everything worse. Just stay strong! <3

You did fight back by saying no, please don't ever believe it's your fault because it's not! Not wanting to physically fight back out of fear is completely understandable, and in no way does it put you at blame. You did nothing wrong, and the fact that you told the police shows incredible strength, good on you. 

it is never your fault your raped never!!!!!

not your fault. if he was 21 you should go to the police and prevent him from doing it to another young girl. but NOTYOURFAULT

the law is fucked!!!!

As someone who has experienced something similar, I can say that I felt a lot of confusion and guilt and up until a few months ago believed it was my fault (part of me still does). But I've learned that when someone oversteps your boundries, no matter what the circumstance, you are not at fault.

? Yeah, as you can tell.... It's never your fault that you were raped... It's whomever who raped you's fault... He must have some severe psychological issues, either that... Or a really bad conscience.?

 

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