I don't want to do this anymore.

Life just isn't getting any better. I've contemplated suicide so many times because I feel like there's no reason to be here anymore, so why should I make myself suffer and be miserable all the time? I'm 21 and still haven't graduated from college, I have a job I'm hating more and more everyday, my dad is emotionally abusive, I'm constantly broke therefore my dad has to help me with everything because I have to pay bills and don't have money left over because my job doesn't pay much at all, I'm lonely as hell, and I'm relapsing with my eating disorder. I'm tired of living at home and I can't move out because I can't afford it. And being with my dad everyday is eating me alive. I can't deal with his bi-polar disorder and being cussed out everyday and called lazy and worthless when I'm far from lazy. I just don't see the point anymore.. And I feel like I'm on the brink of taking my life and it scares me a little, but on the other hand it gives me a sense of freedom and relief. I had a mental breakdown tonight in front of my mom and punched myself, pulled my hair out, and screamed. I couldn't stop shaking. I just think it's time for me to end things.. Sorry for my rant. I just had to get this off my chest.

I completely understand how you feel, I'd be happy to talk with you if you want feel free to message me :) 

Sometimes all you need to do is vent . It's strange how finally speaking out about how you feel lifts a weight off your shoulders. If you need someone to talk to you can always message me (: I hope everything is going well

 

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