Cut again

Okay. So I have gone 4 ears without cutting. But with everything going on in my life right now and my depression being really bad latey. I cut for the first time in 4 years. For the past 4 years even though I have not been cutting I have been scratching myself till I bleed or I would dig my nails into my skin causig me to rip out pieces of my skin. I just don't know what to do anymore.?

Stress will trigger it.

Congratulations on 4 years.

Though ideally one should not have to suffer. I hope you are seeing a doctor for your depression bcause it is a treatable medical condition, even though it probably seems like the problem is with the world, I've been there, the problem isn't with the picture, the problem is with the camera, and it can be fixed. It can be cured. You can be well again.

I have been on medication for alot of things including depression for years. My bf is worried because he does not want me to have a relapse.

Different things work for different people. Does being with your boyfriend help?

There's a book called WRAP Wellness Recovery Action Plan. Let me see if I can find a link to it...

OK Amazon.com isn't much help. (They have a 1996 edition for $2,624.00) But you can go straight to the source and get the latest version of the book for $10 at
https://www.wrapandrecoverybooks.com/store/wrap.html

Anyway that's a decent book for $10 that lists numerous "tools" (techniques) one can do to stay mentally on the well side.

(I have the book but naturally can't find it offhand.)

"Tools", or things I can think of offhand that can be helpful. Basically the idea is to alleviate stress, as stress leads to relapse and mental illness problems, so we focus on doing things that help keep us well. You get to chose what helps keep you happy and well, then write down a list of those things and focus on that list. You may make a list of things you do every day to keep yourself happy and well, things you do frequently, things you can do when you start feeling down, you can make a list of things that trigger you, things that trouble you, etc.

Some things that can help may be: exercise, take a walk, go somewhere, get together with people, go to a support group, get together with your boyfriend, go to a movie with your boyfriend, or friends, do something which distracts your mind.

Mindfulness meditation. Yoga. Tai-Chi or Qi-gong.

Eat healthy. A little walking. A little sunlight each day. Establish a regular sleep schedule. Try to keep a balanced life. Identify what is unbalanced in your life. What is missing. Find your spiritual path.

The WRAP book can be used for any kind of 'recovery'. Recovery from cutting, or from depression (which I think cutting is just a symptom of). There's also a workbook that goes along with the red WRAP book, but I think you can just use paper, you don't really need the workbook, though you can get it if you want.

The meditation can help some people with depression, and be a substitute for cutting, and can help heal the brain if you can do it for several weeks. Some people can't seem to catch on to the idea, so for them? I suggest meditative motion exercises such as Yoga or tai-chi. People are different. Try different things, see what works for you.

Your boyfriend can also learn what to do to better be supportive of you. If there's a local NAMI chapter in your area he could take a NAMI "Family to Family" class. That's a class for people who have a family member with mental illness. It teaches family members how to better deal with family members, how to be more supportive.

Maybe there are support groups in your area. Those can be helpful if you like them. Or some activity or hobby you enjoy. (I know it's kind of hard to vaguely suggest things. I myself have a hard time thinking of things I like to do!)

Possibly add more structure to your life? Make your life predictable? So you always know you're where you're supposed to be, doing what you are supposed to be doing. Whatever helps make you feel safe and more relaxed.

Being with my boyfriend helps alot. afew days ago he took my pocket knife away from me cuz I was not doing so well mentally. He said I was not getting it back till he knew for sure I wouldn't hurt myself. Yesterday my aunt who is very against me being with him was rude and it really upset me. He ended up holding me in a way that I wasn't able to husrt myself. I have been spending the night at his place lately because when I am with him I am not stressed and I am able to be myself.

 

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