What do I do?..

I was in a four year relationship. He is 20 and I am 21. Everything went so well, but this past year things began to change. I had a boyfriend that has A.D.D. He wasn't taking his medication and used alcohol and weed to cope himself. It became excessive and I couldn't control it. Past couple months, he has been verbally abusive towards me. He would tell me I am fat, unattractive in bed and intelligent. He would control what I ate and I couldn't tell his family about his strange behavior or else he will break up with me. I went up and down for this guy I loved and he treated bad. I did my best to make him happy. When I went to Kansas for christmas break he was alone in the apartment. He us to move out and find a good place for us but all of a sudden he told me we needed to break up. I was sad and when I arrived at the apartment I begged and begged for him to stay and I will make things better. He ignored me and was on his phone so I took it and ran in the bathroom. He tried to push me out and I warned him not to do it or else I would drop it and he didn't listen. I dropped it. It broke and he was mad at me. I took his laptop so I can hide it and he came and pinned me down and started to choke me. I couldn't breathe and he told he was self defense. I was so shocked that I couldnt remember anything. I took it phone again and told him to stop. He squeezed me half to death and threw me on the ground. I ran to the door and told him to stay or else I would call the cops and he pushed me so hard that I fell and hit the corner of the wall on my head. I was knocked out for a mintue and tried to ran toward him but he just pushed me hard and ran.I didn't report him..... I wished I could have but I loved him and I cared to much to do such a thing. Now, I regret it because he is telling everyone a different story saying I am the crazy one. I need help... I want it to go away and he is not listening to me. What can i do to move on or do something about it. He won't admit it.. :( 


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