Abuse, mental illness, counselling help

I'll just start with a brief background.?
​I'm from the UK, I'm now an undergrad and I was abused by my parents (physically and emotionally) before i left. and I was locked in the house and unable to leave my room (second floor). I had everything taken off me, no way of contacting anyone for two months, and was pulled out of school right before my final exams. I managed to get a neighbour to call the police and I was removed from there.
​I'm now at uni. Since leaving, multiple people have told me to see counsellors, to get help. Things fluctuate, from nightmares, to not wanting to do anything, flashbacks, I'm very easily startled and can lash out at people even when I know they're okay. But the thing is is the university counsellors are terrible - I've already seen two, the first one was a man who just said as long as I was managing to attend lectures and do my work and get by day to day I was fine. The second listened to my story and laughed, saying how there's no solution to the fact I simultaneously hate and miss my family and she stopped the sessions (I saw her twice, a total of 1.5 hours) as I was able to attend lectures and was getting by.
I don't know if I have depression or anxiety (I have a friend who's depressed, and I'm not like she is?) and the counsellor said that I was fine.?
​Is this fine? I can read my own words back and this can't be fine? So why did everyone who was there when I left home say get help, and everyone I've spoken to about getting help (two uni counsellors, my subject tutor (who looks after only 4 of us), and the college welfare team) says I'm fine or just sends me links of self-help stuff off the internet which cost money that I don't have. I'm getting by but I don't have any help. Can I just get people's thoughts on this, I don't have a clue what's going on with me

I suggest, and this may not make any t sense until later after you've done it for a while, find a meditation group or class. Buddhist centers often have them.?

Or a therapeutic yyoga class.? Or tai-chtai-chi, or qi-gong class.

The brain can get rewired by ttrauma. The brainbrain can also undo that rewiring and migrate towatowards a more calm seserene healthy state. This is a casecase where Eastern mmedicine actually woworks.?

Learn to focus yyour mind on the prepresent moment. WhenWhen your mind wanders, bring it back tto the present momoment. keep doing ththis. After a few wwerks of practice yoyou will start to jojotice an improvemimprovement.

(sorry this websiwebsite combined with mymy tablet keeps mesmessing up my words.)

You can heal from this. It will taktake about a year. AlsAlso you will find youryour muse spirit guidguide person who will walk with you alalong your journeyjourney.

findingba group oof people who underunderstsnd can be helpfhelpful. maybe a mental health support group. maybe a PTPTSD support group. tthe brain relaxesrelaxes and switches ininto heal mode when it feels safe, susurrounded by acceptiaccepting people who just aacceot you as you arare, where you are.

there are numeronumerous meditatupuon apps you can try. (Eg HeHeadspace is one). TheThe brain is plastplastic. it can rewirerewirevutself. you can ccoerce it to rewire itself inin a more positive way. by doing medimeditation, or any focfocus your mind trainibtrainibg. You can recoverecover.

sorry those younyoung ciuncekors did nonot know how to propproperly help you. talk therapy can helhelp, but its not ththe whole solution.n solution is ffind a mindfulness mmeditation group. orbyorbyoga? or qi-gong. itit will unwire your trauma..

How are you now??


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