Anxiety?

I think my anxiety has been developing for years and now its reached a point where yesterday I felt like I was going to have a breakdown. Since I was a child (in primary school) I felt really lonely at times and I think this was due to my friends constantly moving away.?Always feeling misunderstood.?I felt?very, very anxious being away from my parents. For example, at my afterschool club I would be very nervous as I thought my parents would die. Another is when I went abroad for a foreign exchange trip last?year, extremely panicked and anxious for the first six hours but it was so that I could barely breathe.​?Recently, I've just been feeling anxious and nervous. I find it very difficult to talk to people I don't know, and its so distressing. I'm terrified of what others think of me. I'm anxious waiting for people or being alone in a crowd. I'm finding myself constantly daydreaming about my own violent death - murder, being run over, explosion. I feel like there's something wrong with me. I experience a 'butterfly feeling', increased heart rate and sweating under my arms. I will feel sad and distant, withdrawing myself when I feel like this. My personality seems to have split in two and I hate it, at school I'm more solemn and serious but at home I'm happy and excitable and can't stop talking. It's awful and I hate it.?Has anyone else experienced it? How do I fix it? Am I overreacting or am I just convincing myself I feel this way? :) Thank youuuu?

Is anxiety being caused by loneliness?

Well here's one thing that can happen. The body has a "fight or flight" mode, and an opposite mode known as "rest, digest, restore".

Technically, the body has a Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS), which gets activated when we are being chased by a tiger, this puts the body/mind in immediate survival mode. The only thing that matters is escaping this stress. Stop digesting food, flood the muscles with energy so they're ready to move, and shut down the brain's prefrontal cortex, because this is a life-or-death scenario and we don't want to waste time thinking about things, we just want action to get away from the tiger or fight the tiger. (or free and hope the tiger doesn't see us).

Even though we're not being chased by tigers anymore, our modern day society invents a whole lot of potential artificial stress for us to endlessly worry about, and we can easily get stuck with our SNS mode activated for extended periods of time, and this can be very detrimental to our health and wellbeing. We need to learn to do things which will activate our Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS)(restm digest, restore) mode and deactivate the SNS mode.

This is what Mindfulness Meditation and Mindfulness Motion exercises such as Qi-gong, Tai-Chi, or Therapeutic Yoga teach us to do. We train our brain to do these simple things because it tricks the brain into becoming calm and peaceful, activating the PNS, which in turn activates our desire to socialize and be friendly with other people.

So the whole key is to train your brain to focus on the present moment. (You can also look up Meditation apps for your cell phone. There's a lot of them.) Focus your mind on the present moment, and when your mind wanders, return your focus to the present moment. Do this for one minute practice whenever you get a one minute break.

Eventually you'll be albe to expand the time doing this to 2 minutes, 5 minuts, 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 25 minutes. You'll discover that you can have 25 minutes fly by quickly when you meditate. It's healthy for the brain, relaxes the brain/body, activates the PNS, activates the prefrontal cortex where rational decisions are made, and activates a desire to interact with people. In the PNS mode people naturally interact with other people in easy ways.

Qi-gong, Tai-Chi, Therapeutic Yoga combine motion with the mindfulness training, helping to train both body and mind, and tune up the body/mind connection.

Also fear melts away when you can deactivate the SNS. Anxiety and panic diminish.

(Anti-Anxiety medications can also help and be a short cut. Can be taken until they are no longer needed. However be careful not to become addicted to them. They're not too addicting, but some people take way more than they should, for way longer than they should, and then problems arise when they try to stop.)

You may be able to find a meditation group you an join. The group may have a teacher who talks breifly about how to meditate, followed by let's actually do this. There are "Guided Meditation" which can be helpful if you don't want to just sit there in silence for 25 minutes. Many Buddhist plaes offer meditation classes, as they are heavily into it. Meditation been around for thousands of years beause it works. I've heard some schools are starting to incorporate Meditation into their curriculum.

Stressful situations, such a going to a new location you aren't familiar with, having difficulty connecting with friends (due to SNS being activated, you're in "fight or flight" mode, not in "Let's have a friendly chat" mode, because your body thinks it's being chased by a tiger. How does it know? Because you're stressed! Mitigate the stress and everything else starts to heal and eventually you get better and feel better.

Best wishes!

del677:?Is anxiety being caused by loneliness?Well here's one thing that can happen. The body has a "fight or flight" mode, and an opposite mode known as "rest, digest, restore".Technically, the body has a Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS), which gets activated when we are being chased by a tiger, this puts the body/mind in immediate survival mode. The only thing that matters is escaping this stress. Stop digesting food, flood the muscles with energy so they're ready to move, and shut down the brain's prefrontal cortex, because this is a life-or-death scenario and we don't want to waste time thinking about things, we just want action to get away from the tiger or fight the tiger. (or free and hope the tiger doesn't see us).Even though we're not being chased by tigers anymore, our modern day society invents a whole lot of potential artificial stress for us to endlessly worry about, and we can easily get stuck with our SNS mode activated for extended periods of time, and this can be very detrimental to our health and wellbeing. We need to learn to do things which will activate our Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS)(restm digest, restore) mode and deactivate the SNS mode.This is what Mindfulness Meditation and Mindfulness Motion exercises such as Qi-gong, Tai-Chi, or Therapeutic Yoga teach us to do. We train our brain to do these simple things because it tricks the brain into becoming calm and peaceful, activating the PNS, which in turn activates our desire to socialize and be friendly with other people.So the whole key is to train your brain to focus on the present moment. (You can also look up Meditation apps for your cell phone. There's a lot of them.) Focus your mind on the present moment, and when your mind wanders, return your focus to the present moment. Do this for one minute practice whenever you get a one minute break.Eventually you'll be albe to expand the time doing this to 2 minutes, 5 minuts, 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 25 minutes. You'll discover that you can have 25 minutes fly by quickly when you meditate. It's healthy for the brain, relaxes the brain/body, activates the PNS, activates the prefrontal cortex where rational decisions are made, and activates a desire to interact with people. In the PNS mode people naturally interact with other people in easy ways.Qi-gong, Tai-Chi, Therapeutic Yoga combine motion with the mindfulness training, helping to train both body and mind, and tune up the body/mind connection.Also fear melts away when you can deactivate the SNS. Anxiety and panic diminish.(Anti-Anxiety medications can also help and be a short cut. Can be taken until they are no longer needed. However be careful not to become addicted to them. They're not too addicting, but some people take way more than they should, for way longer than they should, and then problems arise when they try to stop.)You may be able to find a meditation group you an join. The group may have a teacher who talks breifly about how to meditate, followed by let's actually do this. There are "Guided Meditation" which can be helpful if you don't want to just sit there in silence for 25 minutes. Many Buddhist plaes offer meditation classes, as they are heavily into it. Meditation been around for thousands of years beause it works. I've heard some schools are starting to incorporate Meditation into their curriculum.Stressful situations, such a going to a new location you aren't familiar with, having difficulty connecting with friends (due to SNS being activated, you're in "fight or flight" mode, not in "Let's have a friendly chat" mode, because your body thinks it's being chased by a tiger. How does it know? Because you're stressed! Mitigate the stress and everything else starts to heal and eventually you get better and feel better.Best wishes

​Firstly, thank you so much for taking the time to write this reply! I think meditation would be an excellent idea and what you said about 'fight or flight' responses is really interesting. :)?I think my anxiety may be caused by loneliness but when I'm at my loneliest I get nightmares...Just two nights ago I dreamt that I murdered someone horribly. Sometimes when I'm alone with my thoughts I get even more anxious. However, maybe like you said, I can slowly increase the time I do it and concentrate my thoughts on positiveness and relaxation for longer.?I told my dad yesterday I was feeling like this and he just said it was normal for a teenage girl but he tried to be very understanding. I don't think I will have the opportunity to get anxiety medication and I wouldn't want to suggest it in case I'm overreacting (worrying about that) but do you think I may be able to benefit from it? I'm not anxious all the time its just sometimes but it just seems to stay with me. Worrying about my anxiety.?Thank you! :)?

 

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